JOKES 4 U...

[trent bortknob]

jean-paul sartre walked into a café and said "i'll take a coffee without cream"
the waitress responded "we're all out of cream. would you like it without milk instead?"




a snail was walkin along the road when all of a sudden he was mugged by two tortoises. the snail police found him and asked him what happened and he said "i don't know it all happened so fast!!"

[zhicago]

a+ thread

[shura]

why was the chicken happy!?!??!?!??!!?!???!?!!?











































































































because everything was eggcellent

[retrosmash]

What did the cookie say to the muffin?







































"fuck off"

[Wasim]

whats beef?

[BluPhoenix]

A couple were arguing about buying a new car for weeks. he wanted a new truck, she wanted a fast little sports car. he would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way overpriced. "look!" she said. "I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in 4 seconds or less, my birthday is coming up. surprise me!"

































































































so, for her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale

[retrosmash]

lmfao that is just MEAN

[trent bortknob]

oh i thought i called this thread "JOKES 4 U..." i didnt realize that i accidentally called it "everybody post your unfunny jokes" my mistake

[jjjjjjjjjj]

shut the fuck up taylor














































































you heard me



THIS POST HAS BEEN EDITED BY J_SEED

[rtil]

a jew, a mexican and a black walk into a bar

the bartender says get the fuck out

[Necronomitr0n]

what's the difference between a mexican and a table?





















































the table can support a family

[emanhattan]

a jew, a mexican and a black walk into a bar

the bartender says get the fuck out

lmfao this actually made me laugh real hard

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/lKKur8C4WVg&hl=es_MX&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/lKKur8C4WVg&hl=es_MX&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>

[DrRumack]

what did the taylor say to the everyone else????


















i dunno probably somethin gay

[lenko]

what the difference between a pile of dead babies and asparagus?






































i don't eat asparagus

[spite]

whats the best thing about little boys????

turn'em over and they're little girls.......

how do you kick a hillbilly in the balls?
kick his sister in the back of the head

"How can you tell the sex of a chromosome!? pull down its genes!"

I'm getting these from a 60 page offensive joke thread

What's the difference between a dead baby and an onion?

I don't cry when I cut up a dead baby...

[Mew_User]

Once upon a time, there was a man who wanted to build a house. But, being a little eccentric, he wanted to build the house using only 99 bricks. So he went to the hardware store and said, "Hello, I like to buy 99 bricks."

The owner of the store told him, "I'm sorry, we only sell bricks in quantities of 100."

"Can't you cut me a deal or something?" the man asked.

"Nope, sorry," replied the owner. So the guy bought 100 bricks.

He took the bricks back to his lot, and he built a house using 99 bricks. Now, if you do the math, 100 minus 99 is 1, so he had one brick left. And he took that brick, and he just chucked it, way up in the air!
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A guy was riding on an airplane, and he decided to smoke a cigar. Unfortunately, he was sitting next to a woman with a dog. The dog began coughing, so the lady said, "Excuse me, sir, but could you please put out your cigar? It's really bothering my dog."

He angrily replied, "No, I won't! You shouldn't have a dog on this flight anyways!"

"This is a non-smoking flight! You need to put that cigar out!" she said. They argued back and forth... get rid of the dog, put out the cigar, and so on.

Finally, the man said, "Look, I'll compromise with you. If you get rid of your dog, I'll get rid of the cigar." HE was thinking, "She'll never want to give up her dog." But much to his surprise, she agreed to the deal!

The lady opened the window (amazingly, without causing the air pressure inside the plane to drop) and threw her dog out. The man, thinking that he had another cigar anyways, threw his cigar out the window, thinking that he had won.

However, the woman suddenly reached out the window, and grabbed her dog's leash! As she pulled the dog back in, she was thinking that she'd won, but do you know what the dog had in its mouth?

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A BRICK!!!!

[Kött]

How to make a woman shout twice in a row?
First fuck her ass drily, then wipe off you dick on the curtains

What defines a real macho?
He gets a blojob and asks if he was good
What defines a supermacho?
He gets a blowjob, doesn't get a hardon and asks: "Does this happen often when you do this?"

Sum lil kid is banging his sister. She: "Damn, you' even better than daddy!" He: "That's just what mom says!"

[trent bortknob]

shut the fuck up taylor

what did the rtil say to the jseed "you're not a fuckin mod anymore becuase you sucked faggot" haha lol!

[DrRumack]

its funny cuz its never happening lol!

[lenko]

stealth mod