jean-paul sartre walked into a café and said "i'll take a coffee without cream"
the waitress responded "we're all out of cream. would you like it without milk instead?"
a snail was walkin along the road when all of a sudden he was mugged by two tortoises. the snail police found him and asked him what happened and he said "i don't know it all happened so fast!!"
a+ thread
why was the chicken happy!?!??!?!??!!?!???!?!!?
because everything was eggcellent
What did the cookie say to the muffin?
"fuck off"
whats beef?
A couple were arguing about buying a new car for weeks. he wanted a new truck, she wanted a fast little sports car. he would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way overpriced. "look!" she said. "I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in 4 seconds or less, my birthday is coming up. surprise me!"
so, for her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale
lmfao that is just MEAN
oh i thought i called this thread "JOKES 4 U..." i didnt realize that i accidentally called it "everybody post your unfunny jokes" my mistake
shut the fuck up taylor
you heard me
THIS POST HAS BEEN EDITED BY J_SEED
a jew, a mexican and a black walk into a bar
the bartender says get the fuck out
what's the difference between a mexican and a table?
the table can support a family
Quote from: rtila jew, a mexican and a black walk into a bar
the bartender says get the fuck out
lmfao this actually made me laugh real hard
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/lKKur8C4WVg&hl=es_MX&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/lKKur8C4WVg&hl=es_MX&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>
what did the taylor say to the everyone else????
i dunno probably somethin gay
what the difference between a pile of dead babies and asparagus?
i don't eat asparagus
whats the best thing about little boys????
turn'em over and they're little girls.......
how do you kick a hillbilly in the balls?
kick his sister in the back of the head
"How can you tell the sex of a chromosome!? pull down its genes!"
I'm getting these from a 60 page offensive joke thread
What's the difference between a dead baby and an onion?
I don't cry when I cut up a dead baby...
Once upon a time, there was a man who wanted to build a house. But, being a little eccentric, he wanted to build the house using only 99 bricks. So he went to the hardware store and said, "Hello, I like to buy 99 bricks."
The owner of the store told him, "I'm sorry, we only sell bricks in quantities of 100."
"Can't you cut me a deal or something?" the man asked.
"Nope, sorry," replied the owner. So the guy bought 100 bricks.
He took the bricks back to his lot, and he built a house using 99 bricks. Now, if you do the math, 100 minus 99 is 1, so he had one brick left. And he took that brick, and he just chucked it, way up in the air!
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
A guy was riding on an airplane, and he decided to smoke a cigar. Unfortunately, he was sitting next to a woman with a dog. The dog began coughing, so the lady said, "Excuse me, sir, but could you please put out your cigar? It's really bothering my dog."
He angrily replied, "No, I won't! You shouldn't have a dog on this flight anyways!"
"This is a non-smoking flight! You need to put that cigar out!" she said. They argued back and forth... get rid of the dog, put out the cigar, and so on.
Finally, the man said, "Look, I'll compromise with you. If you get rid of your dog, I'll get rid of the cigar." HE was thinking, "She'll never want to give up her dog." But much to his surprise, she agreed to the deal!
The lady opened the window (amazingly, without causing the air pressure inside the plane to drop) and threw her dog out. The man, thinking that he had another cigar anyways, threw his cigar out the window, thinking that he had won.
However, the woman suddenly reached out the window, and grabbed her dog's leash! As she pulled the dog back in, she was thinking that she'd won, but do you know what the dog had in its mouth?
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A BRICK!!!!
How to make a woman shout twice in a row?
First fuck her ass drily, then wipe off you dick on the curtains
What defines a real macho?
He gets a blojob and asks if he was good
What defines a supermacho?
He gets a blowjob, doesn't get a hardon and asks: "Does this happen often when you do this?"
Sum lil kid is banging his sister. She: "Damn, you' even better than daddy!" He: "That's just what mom says!"
Quote from: J_Seedshut the fuck up taylor
what did the rtil say to the jseed "you're not a fuckin mod anymore becuase you sucked faggot" haha lol!
its funny cuz its never happening lol!
stealth mod
A man goes into a diner and orders a cup of coffee.
Upon tasting it he spits it out and pushes it away in disgust.
"Waitress!!", he exclaims.
"This coffee is horrible! It can't be very fresh, it tastes like MUD!!"
"Why of course it is!", says the waitress.
"It was ground this morning!"
ahahaha
Quote from: MrScriblamits funny cuz its never happening lol!
i think he already lost his mod abilities
i remember when jseed lost his mod abilities heh
heh
man wtf!
http://www.thebackalleys.com/dump/files/590/164Jy4_Kill%20Satan%20-%201.mp3
how many polish leaders does it take to crash a plane
apparently all of them
lmao!
Hahahaha
what is jseed's favorite hairstyle?
threadlocks
Q: how many bruce springsteens does it take to screw in a lightbulb
A: none because he just hires somebody to do it for him
Q: why did bruce springsteen decide to become a musician?
A: idk
Q: what is bruce springsteen\\\'s favorite season?
A: winter
Q: why did bruce springsteen die???
A: idk he probably did too many drugs
Knock knock.
Who\\\'s there?
Bruce.
Bruce who?
Bruce Springsteen lol
Q: Why did they cancel the all you can eat buffet?
A: because they there was a bruce springsteen concert happening across the street.
What\\\'s the difference between Bruce Springsteen and a jar of pickles?
The jar of pickles doesn\\\'t make mediocre music.
Who would win in a fight? Bon Jovi or Bruce Springsteen?
Bruce Springsteen DUHHH
Knock knock
Who\\\'s there.
Bruce
Bruce who?
Bruce springsteen.
Holy shit really?
No just kidding lol
hey guys do u know someone that goes by the name deez
deez???
yeah deez NUTS
fuck
you
this thread should continue
What do you call a sparrow trapped in a freezer?
A BRRRRRRRRRR-d!
how do you make a napkin dance put a little boogie in it
lmao wow
when u rap i sit down i cant stand a wack rapper
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
it didn't have the (https://thebackalleys.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.seeklogo.com%2Fimages%2FN%2FNickelodeon_GUTS-logo-2EB5055EE8-seeklogo.com.gif&hash=2b70f5aaf839984e58a07ca32c3d60062e60d633)
If life gives you AIDS make lemonAIDS.
q. what did bruce springsteen say to the ex-wife?
a. hey, how are the kids doing
q. why did bruce springsteen sell his car?
a. to make money
q. why isnt bruce springsteen popular anymore?
a. idk probably because he doesnt make very good music
q. why is bruce springsteen's nickname "the boss"?
a. idk
knock knock
who's there
bruce
bruce who
bruce frederick joseph springsteen
knock knock
who's there
bruce springsteen
bruce springsteen who
motherfuckin BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN THATS WHO NIGGA
knock knock
who's there
bruce
bruce who
bruce springsteen's daughter
these are good jokes
so a seal walks into a club
i dont get it
how many conceptart.org users does it take to screw in a lightbulb
none cos they all have their thumbs up each others asses
its on now vegeta
6 million Jewish people were taken from their homes, detained, tortured, and murdered in World War 2.
Quote from: Lats, Squats, & Oates6 million Jewish people were taken from their homes, detained, tortured, and murdered in World War 2.
A Daily HaHa!!!
levon
what's the capital of greece?
a teenager's hair
Quote from: BluPhoeniX7what's the capital of greece?
a teenager's hair
No you idiot it's "who cares, it's being burnt down to the ground and their economy sucks balls" durp
way to bump