Hello its me. Im back exclusively for my most favourite thing in the entire world:
Stories about Terrible highschool teachers or college professors Regurgitating Flash poo poo and looking like total idiots[/u]
Or just anything from 2000-2009 where anyone suffered through the same teachers getting it all wrong.
This isnt limited to flash; If you sat in computer science or the basics and the Teacher was a real cow
And All you learned from her premade lesson plan was how to copy and paste and summon the clipboard and waste everyones fucking time, because this literally took maybe 10 seconds to google at any period during 4 years of highschool.
I was like fuming at the end of that class, and it didnt even mean I'd get to learn how to code in anything cool; They promised Java and Networking as a Senior student but Im guessing because "Memo" wasn't a tech school all they really did was pat the girls on the back for "behaving--being obedient" , told the guys to play more basketball and behave during World war 2 ceremonies.
Honest, if I can be so candid; I bounced around a lot ( 8 schools ) before realizing the requirements wasn't whether I had the aptitude or not, but if I had the number of hours and credits required. It wasn't totally bogus, but it just kinda left me thinking "I dont wanna be a 22 year old highschool student, I'm gonna fuck off and try my luck in Northern ON instead".
And needless to say; I had nothing in common with Teenage single moms or fellas who smoked Players or Belmonts between class, or flexed about getting DVD movies off Kazaa; I was painfully nerdy back then -- I still am but its easier to hide now.
So yea; if you have any stories about FLASH or STUPID SCHOOL TEACHERS, go on --
We had a substitute math teacher who managed to teach nothing but matrices for like three months and suddenly disappeared while we were waiting for marks that would effectively determine whether we passed the year or not; I seem to remember when they did finally appear they were seemingly entirely random. Some time later I saw her at the mall and she'd dyed her hair blonde, which probably didn't mean anything but we joked that it made her prior disappearance rather more suspicious.
it seems like the running theme of flash "teachers" is that most of them were basically frauds. i should have been one! B)
my absolute worst teacher in university was 100% my 2nd year flash course 1st semester. idk where they found this guy, but he barely knew anything about flash and was not an artist by any means. he had programmed some extremely basic game, of which i'm certain he just ripped the code from stackexchange or something. he was unable to teach us basically anything, and one day he even had me do a "guest lecture" of sorts where i probably taught the class more about how flash works in an hour than he could have all semester.
needless to say he didn't last and was fired after 1 semester, and an animation teacher took over the course.
apparently one day he was sighted outside the 7/11 adjacent to the parking lot of our uni, quietly sobbing while eating a donut. he knew he failed, but it wasn't his fault, really. he was a nice guy, he just wasn't cut out to be teaching, well, anything.
Quote from: wasp on February 4, 2026 05:52 PMSome time later I saw her at the mall and she'd dyed her hair blonde, which probably didn't mean anything but we joked that it made her prior disappearance rather more suspicious.
ahahahahahahahah.
Quoteapparently one day he was sighted outside the 7/11 adjacent to the parking lot of our uni, quietly sobbing while eating a donut. he knew he failed, but it wasn't his fault, really. he was a nice guy, he just wasn't cut out to be teaching, well, anything.
(https://flashjunkmind.com/emoji/ohman.png)
This was too good.
Not the most interesting story but I took a summer course that was supposed to be web design / layout / html kind of stuff, had kind of a similar experience to Rtil. Just someone who was a primary teacher of something else teaching off a premade guide. If I recall I think the class was too small so they dumped it on whoever to I assume save money from hiring someone competent? Anyways it took less than a day to realize I knew more than said teacher did. Was able to drop it, got a refund, so whatever.
Not my first time being in a position where I knew more than the teacher on a strictly technical side at least. I bet that sort of thing was a lot more common with computer-related classes back in the day than it is now.
I think with tech stuff its becoming very alienating for the uh "professor" not to have a deep investment in the material. Like im sure English Science and Math or anything in the Stem fields are all fundamentals and they branch out into greater things, but when it comes to early 2000s web tech no one had a fucking idea and thought it'd be really cool to cram some loser infront of the class and tell everyone things they knew nothing about
I hate how my story was just first month of Highschool and some cow was teaching us how to copy and paste using the spread sheet or giving us tips on how to use Excel. Or this nauseating flex on using homerow to type when that is the natural way to type anyway -- you learn from two finger typing to maybe 6 on each finger tops grrrrr
Anyway, strawberry clock is the king of the portal.
Oh I have another story, about the 2nd highschool cuz I switched schools a lot and saw maybe 4 computer labs. I wasn't dysfunctional -- I wasnt smoking cigarettes near the fire exit, But I kept missing a lot of school -- within the first year I was at another until a bunch of jerks from prior grades all showed up at the very next one cuz they had disciplinary issues and im like "wow I better walk home I never liked these hockey loving MTG card stealing types".
more later.
my wife didn't learn homerow and she doesn't type like that. she doesn't look at the keyboard but her fingers are all over the place. it scares me
Quote from: rtil on February 20, 2026 06:50 PMmy wife didn't learn homerow and she doesn't type like that. she doesn't look at the keyboard but her fingers are all over the place. it scares me
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Yea, so I think for my 2nd year I went to another school that wasn't completely far; they were making exceptions for kids out of district. The computer lab for this Tech school was a little more advanced; none of the computers were running "windows 3.11 for work groups" or ran like pureshit; all of them were pretty much running Adobe Photoshop, Flash 5, Flash MX, 3DS Max, and probably decent enough to run Maya but probably chugged when rendering -- the entire lab was not a render farm, but the 3DSMAX demo's were all there. There were 3 but I could only find the one.
Like this one:
I was only in that class for maybe a month, until that time, the teacher was a real artsy fartsy beatnik guy; nothing against him at all -- he wasnt an asshole. He was probably the only cool teacher I met who was totally intune with the material, with his students, and class -- the tech and what they were doing loooool. He did give this pitch telling 8th graders who toured the school in the fall "We'll be teaching you webanimation, 3d animation, stuff you've seen on sites like shockwave and newgrounds dotcom" (loool) -- And honestly out of all the types, He was probably the slickest guy. But yea he had a lot of DVD's stolen idk why
One time we had a substitute though; she didnt know what she was doing. He left a bunch of DVDs behind but basically told her "pick one to watch, thats the class, dont steal anything". He came back the following day and went "Are you fucking kidding? They stole MY DVDs?!?!?" and the movie the broad put on was like TitanAE. Almost all the workstations had some computer generated artwork, some kid redoing an animation cell of ren and stimpy (??? I dont remember the context) or like that one asian kid trying to design a flyer for next weeks school assembly. There was this one brainstorming session where we'd try to come up with the steps toward something and he'd gracefully try to push the instruction in the right direction after a bunch of guessing, so it wasn't always him giving instructions all the time like:
"OK 1) OPEN FILE 2) SELECT IMPORT 3) SELECT DEMO.PSD" etc.
The students there were really smart, I think I convinced a few of them to play Quake3 Arena for a bit, but the 3rd button mouse zoom wasnt working, and I swore up and down it worked on my pc at home but whatever lol. They all had this internal 'technical' design, on how something would work -- I didn't really figure out the wherewithall for that sort of thing, and I remember photoshop having a ton of effects like adding bevels and dropshadows etc, although in the wrong uncreative hands it just seems like a lot of 'automatic' template work, but most of them knew how to make great stuff in adobe. I didn't really see anyone use flash creatively there, cuz I think it was 2001 still and we were just on 5 back then.
This one tall kid came to class the next day saying he got robbed by somalians on the subway and couldn't get his homework done, the same teacher didn't really believe him but gave him a pass looooool.
I think by the time that month ended, there was another class with another substitute -- everyone was pretty bored, No one really wanted to watch ToyStory 2 and one of these ultra tall kids was fighting the teacher to "PUT ON DRAGON BALL HOMIE", and I just kinda rolled my eyes like "hahaha he wants to put on dragon ball". That bit with Stinky Pete and like 5 barbies got a lot of laughs, but I think the firealarm got pulled half way through and we were all outside for a bit, waiting for the alarm to stop.
And then like, 8 ripe jerks I thought I'd never see again, were all outside calling my name -- That terrified me -- I decided I wanted to be homeschooled and when school ended that day I went home. I dont think my 'Zoloft' was working and I thought 'well I cant really handle this crap right now so im gonna go home and have an anxiety attack there'. Mind you , all those mood-stablizers and anti-depressants like with the moving 'zoloft' blob and maybe paxil; these were more mainstream in the early 2000s, but predated by stuff like Prozac in the 1980s. They were definitely more socially accepted in the 2000s though and I'd remember reading awful stories when teenagers went off them -- yikes.
Anyway that was story #2. There might've been like 2 other schools and I'll probably share those later idk.
Edit: Oh and there was this senior student who was in the lab all the time, working on this 3d model, with like a giant winamp playlist of Jpop from Ayumi hamasaki, all 3 albums worth looooooool.
that guy with the weeb winamp playlist would've been my friend. or literally just me
was this in high school or college? in high school we had a computer lab but i only remember 2 classes in there, one for web design and another for programming. i actually learned a decent amount of Java and VB and made some seriously awful games, one of which i still have - a tic-tac-toe game with 3 difficulty levels. it's a very suspicious looking EXE file
now my computer lab in middle school was an absolute joke. all the machines were one of the first macs, and they were hooked up to the internet but it took the entire goddamn class to load a single page in netscape. i remember that and also playing mario teaches typing, smashing the keyboard keys with gibberish because i was bored, and then the teacher wouldn't let me re-do it so i failed that test.
in that instance it wasn't so much that the teacher was useless, but those computers most certainly were. really, computers were my vice before college. i would use them to waste as much time as humanly possible. hell, i almost failed 3rd grade because i never paid attention and played sim city 2000 on the computer in the portable instead. i really don't know why or how my teacher let me do it - she could clearly see me on the computer, not paying attention. maybe she just didn't give a shit. yeah that's probably it. well at least she was nice enough not to fail me. she probably should have
Quote from: rtil on February 23, 2026 04:48 AMthat guy with the weeb winamp playlist would've been my friend. or literally just me
:cool: :cool: :cool: :cool: :cool:
I didn't think anyone listened to Jpop, outside of that encounter -- I only heard the one song in a playstation game.
(https://www.flashjunkmind.com/pics/tba-forum/dependonyou-x2.png)
Quote from: rtil on February 23, 2026 04:48 AMwas this in high school or college?
Highschool. I don't think I've ever seen the inside of a college/university computer lab