Chansey Dantkin

[Philip K Dick]

Chansey Dantkin was a boisterous man who was as tall as he was short.

[GenericTwat5554]

...frozen in a time and space divide but how would the universe survive?

[PocketIllust]

[redmongoose]

[Philip K Dick]

(Cheater)
By S.PUMPKIN

   Chauncey Dantkin was a fine fellow who was as tall as he was short. He was an upstanding citizen who had committed no less than three criminal acts – misdemeanors, they were – rubbed off his record right after the appropriate fines had been installed. At twenty-four years of age, Chauncey was in the prime of his life.
   
   However, there is something about Chauncey you should know. Dramatic pause... oh to be young again. Ah, where were we... oh yes. For lack of a better word, Chauncey Dantkin was a master. A master of what, you ask?

   Well, of cheating, no less. A brief history is in order.
   
   Chauncey's first run-in with cheating first occurred in primary school when in the second grade, he discovered how incredibly easy it was to take a peek at the other student's answers behind the teacher's back.

   "Seven-year-old Chauncey!" exclaimed Chauncey's best friend at the time, Best O. Friends, after discovering Chauncey had cheated on the Second Grade Final Exam. "I cannot believe you cheated on the Second Grade Final Exam, and by copying off my paper no less!"

   "Sorry bro," said Seven-year-old Chauncey. "But thanks to my über cheating skills and your... elementary disciplines, we have both passed onto the third grade!"

   "It is okay, Seven-year-old Chauncey," said Best. "I forgive you because I am a really good friend."

   "And I forgive you for being a slut."

   Several years later, in middle school, Chauncey discovered the magic of using cheat codes in videogames.

   "Take that, Super Mario brother!" exclaimed Chauncey, thrusting his Nintendo controller high into the air. "Fifty points!"

   "You wouldn't have gotten those points," said Best, "If you hadn't used all those cheat codes!!!"

   "Shut the fuck up faggot," said Chauncey. "You know what, get the fuck out of my house. You are no longer my best friend. Best O. Friends"

   "Whatever."

   Long after Chauncey and Best had parted ways, High-school flavored Chauncey became romantically entangled with several girls. At the same time.

   "High-school flavored Chauncey!" whined Jessica Poopenburger, "You promised me that you wouldn't cheat on me again!"

   "Sorry babe," said High-school flavored Chauncey, "I guess it's just in my nature. Now get the fuck out my house."

   Chauncey Dantkin was a master of all forms of cheating. The saucy kind AND the non-saucy kind. As Jessica Poopenburger darted out of the Dantkin residence as fast as she could possibly run for fear of Chauncey cheating her a new one, she wondered – has there ever been a man who made cheating as saucy as Chauncey Dantkin?

   No.

2 be continuedd..

[trent bortknob]

lmao

[Philip K Dick]

parts 1-5 here  http://s-pumpkin.blogspot.com/2010/02/cheater.html

[anigen]

IF U WERE FLATENNED TOMORROW, I WOULDNT GO 2 UR FUNERAL CUZ ID B N THE FOREST CUTTIN & SETTIN FIRE ALL AROUND DA TREE THAT KILLED U!
..__
(| o________
.|rs_}_______}

WE TRUE LUMBERJACKS
WE JACK TOGETHER
WE DIE TOGETHER
send this CHAINSAW to everyone you care about including me if you care. C how many times you get this, if you get WOOD your A TRUE LUMBERJACK



LUMBERJACKFIST

[The Good Ole Ant]

^l mao


and fff i still owe you shit for big hunk

[billy]

IF U WERE FLATENNED TOMORROW, I WOULDNT GO 2 UR FUNERAL CUZ ID B N THE FOREST CUTTIN & SETTIN FIRE ALL AROUND DA TREE THAT KILLED U!
..__
(| o________
.|rs_}_______}

WE TRUE LUMBERJACKS
WE JACK TOGETHER
WE DIE TOGETHER
send this CHAINSAW to everyone you care about including me if you care. C how many times you get this, if you get WOOD your A TRUE LUMBERJACK



LUMBERJACKFIST

[Ashington]

cheating her a new one

Lmao i love these stories