the jellyfishman's forest

[Philip K Dick]

The Jellyfishman's Forest
By Armon Pakdel
   

Mr. Wopz was not necessarily a good science teacher, but he sure was a fun one! As he guided the class through the field of poisonous jellyfishmen, I nudged my friend Esteban.

   "I heard a rumor that if you eat the core of a mother jellyfishman, you'll gain awesome abilities!" I said with enthusiasm.

   Esteban was terrified and shaking uncontrollably, but considering the nature of the wild jellyfishman, I didn't blame him. We were literally walking amongst nature's most fearsome killers. Of course, they wouldn't attack us unless provoked, or so Mr. Wopz had told us before we had begun our hike through the jellyfishman's forest.

   "I... I wanna go home!" whimpered Esteban.

   "Shut up," I said. "Get a grip, dude. Maybe if you ate a mother jellyfishman's core you would grow some balls. Hahaha!"

   "Listen up class!" began Mr. Wopz as Esteban broke down crying. "We're almost at the end of the forest. You've all done very well so far, unlike last year's class."

   "What happened with last year's class?" came the nasally voice of Marcy Peters, who was at the very front of the line like usual.

   "They all died" stated Mr. Wopz plainly.

   "That is so cool" said one boy who I didn't recognize. "I wanna die!"

   "Well then, Jules," said Mr. Wopz, addressing the boy, "why don't you stop breathing?"

   Several students began to giggle. An embarrassed Jules began to pout.

   "Fine! Maybe I will!"

   He took one step off the trail and bumped right into a jellyfishman. The jellyfishman stood seven feet tall, with its top half resembling a male human, complete with a torso, arms, and head. Eerily, it was missing a face. The bottom half was akin to a jellyfish and consisted of the poisonous trail of wispy stingers that began to slowly wrap themselves around Jules' body the moment he made eye contact.
   As the stingers slowly enveloped Jules' body, his classmates looked on in horror. They tightened and tightened as Jules stood paralyzed by the jellyfishman's eyeless glare. Then, all at once, Jules' entire body exploded in a torrent of blood, bones and organs. Mr. Wopz sighed as the class began to scream, invoking the attention of several more stray jellyfishmen.

   "I was hoping we could avoid any casualties today" said Mr. Wopz, "But it looks like that isn't going to happen. Oh well! Might as well learn the hard way, if you ask me."

   Esteban was still sobbing like a maniac. I pushed the little wimp forward and instead of following the moving line he simply fell to his knees. Pulling him to his feet, I sort of felt sorry for the little guy. I mean, sure, some loser kid had just died, but he probably had an IQ that was less than my cat. I didn't want to hold up the rear end of the line, so I ushered the sniffling Esteban forward and we continued on.

   "We're going to have to keep moving if we don't want anybody else to die" said the teacher. "Like I said, we're almost out of the forest. When we get back to class, we're all doing a worksheet on this field trip."

   The whole class simultaneously sighed. It had been a cool field trip, but the fun was about to end... for some of us, at least.

   "And here we are" began Mr. Wopz. "The end of the forest. If you'll look, you can see the-"
   
   All of a sudden, a horrible piercing noise rang out and resounded all around.

   "What's that sound?" said Marcy.
   
   "Its driving me nuts!" said Josh Friedman, a student standing in the middle of the line who had stopped and was now holding up everyone behind him. It wasn't long before most of the students were down on the ground, plugging their ears. The noise was unbearable. It sounded like a cross between fingernails on a chalkboard and Charlie Manson's music. The only one who seemed to be unaffected by it was Mr. Wopz.

   "That... is the cry of a mother jellyfishman" calmly stated the teacher. "Don't worry, we'll all be dead soon, but it will be relatively painless, so don't worry."

   "Wait a minute" yelled Marcy. "Shouldn't we be running? Or at least, trying to fight this thing off?"

   "No, no." said Mr. Wopz. "That will only make our deaths more painful."

   The sound stopped abruptly and all was silent. I looked at Esteban, who had stopped crying. His expression showed true horror. I wondered why, until I looked in the direction he was looking and saw something truly astonishing. It had to have been at least thirty feet tall, and as it glided swiftly towards the class all we could do was watch in shock and awe. It looked practically the same as a normal jellyfishman, except the massive increase in size... and that was enough to paralyze anyone in fear.

   It was almost on us. Those stingers looked like they were gonna hurt. I made my decision at the last second. I grabbed Esteban and leaped. Did I make it? Was I safe? Had I died? I didn't have the strength to open my eyes. I didn't know if what I was feeling was real.
   
   Eventually I managed to peek one eye open and confirm that yes, I was still alive. This was definitely still the jellyfishman forest and Esteban was laying flat on the ground, motionless, beside me. I whipped around to have my eyes meet a horrifying sight. Mr. Wopz's entire science class was lying dead on the trail. Leaving Esteban to fend for himself, I ran to check for survivors. Scanning the line of dead bodies, I saw nothing at first glance. The mother jellyfishman was a killing machine.
   
   Then suddenly, something tapped my shoulder. I snapped around and stood facing Marcy Peters and Josh Friedman.

   "Hey! You guys survived!" I said. "That's pretty cool, I guess."

   "Thank God you're alive" said Marcy. "I can't believe this is happening..."

   "Is that Esteban over there getting raped by a jellyfishman?" said Josh, pointing over to where I had left the poor guy.

   I looked over and saw Esteban indeed getting raped by a jellyfishman. He wasn't struggling or resisting, in fact he seemed to have lost all of his will to live or fight back.

   "Yeah, don't worry about it" I said. "He can take care of himself."

   I turned my head one more time, and neither Esteban nor the jellyfishman were anywhere to be seen. Huh. Strange.

   "Well! Whaddya say we go home now, guys?" I said, turning my head back to see Mr. Wopz stabbing Josh in the back with a butcher knife, a maniacal look of glee on his face.

   "Mr. Wopz? What are you doing, bro?"

   His eyes met mine, and I knew he wasn't in his right mind. Suddenly I was being pulled by the hand in the other direction. I turned to face my savior. It was Marcy. We didn't look back as we fled.

   We soon realized that we were heading back into the forest, instead of out. Oh well. No turning back now.

   "Mr. Wopz must have been hypnotized by the toxins of the mother jellyfishman" explained Marcy as we came to a stop and caught our breath.

   "Aww, shit" I said. "I really liked him, too!"

   "We can't look back now... we just have to get out of here."

   We began to hike, following the same path we had taken, and avoiding all the jellyfishmen we saw. Occasionally we would hear the faint roar of the mother jellyfishman, and when we did we would hide until it went away. We trekked for several hours with no obstructions. We didn't even bother to talk about what had happened. I think Marcy was pretty disturbed by it. I saw it in her face. She just wanted to get the hell out of here and get back home. I did too, but I was having fun.

   "Did you know that if you kill a mother jellyfishman and eat its core, you gain amazing powers?" I said to her after some time.
   
   "...Where did you hear that one?" she said.

   "I read it in the National Enquirer."

   "The National Enquirer, huh?"

   "Yup."

   "And that's why you went on this field trip instead of ditching?" she said like she had figured something out.

   "Yep! But when I saw that mother jellyfishman, I knew there was no way I could kill it by myself."

   "You wouldn't happen to have bought a mother jellyfishman lure before the trip?"

   "How did you know that?"

   Before I could react, Marcy tackled me.

   "Its your fault all my friends are dead! ITS ALL YOUR FAULT!" she said, sending blow after blow flying my way.

   "Dude!" I managed to say in between punches. "It wasn't my fault! I didn't even know the mother jellyfishman was that big."

   "Ugh!" she screamed, getting up. "Find your own way from here. I hate you!"

   "Whatever, bitch!"

   It WAS kind of my fault everyone had died. I had bought a mother jellyfishman lure before the trip. In fact it was still in my pants pocket. But like Marcy herself had said, its all in the past. No looking back. So what was her problem?

   I watched Marcy stomp out of sight. I decided it would be better to head in the other direction, so as not to increase my chances of running into her again. Stupid slut.

   I had only been walking for several minutes when I heard the maniacal laugh that I could only recognize as my science teacher's. I twisted around, ready for an attack. Mr. Wopz was nowhere to be found. His laugh resounded again, and this time I identified its source. Looking up, I saw Mr. Wopz, perched upon the branch of a tree. He bared his fangs at me and leaped. I rolled to the side as he came barreling down.

   Looking around for something that would make a fair fight, I didn't see anything at first, but as soon as Mr. Wopz began to charge at me, I saw a very sharp looking branch. Picking it up, I brandished it. Mr. Wopz backed off, hissing. Taking the initiative, I began to close in on the teacher with the stick.

   That's when Mr. Wopz walked straight back into a wild jellyfishman. Ensnaring him within its stingers, it squeezed until the pressure was too much, then... POP. Mr. Wopz was no more. I was splattered with blood.

   That's when I noticed that this was no ordinary jellyfishman that had killed Mr. Wopz. This jellyfishman resembled someone I knew. Could it be?

   "Esteban?" I said, taking a step forward.

   The jellyfishman did indeed resemble my friend, who had disappeared after being raped not too long ago. I took another step forward to get a better view of it.

   That's when it got me. The stingers hurt, and I couldn't move. I felt them grow tighter and tighter. Then, finally....

   It stopped. The jellyfishman dropped dead in front of me. Behind it stood Marcy, branch in hand, impaling the beast.

   "You came back for me, you dumb whore!" I said with a hint of gratitude.

   "I couldn't just leave you" she said with a smile.

   "Lets get out of here."

   "Lets."

   THE END

[Daveb0t]

whatever happened to estaban

and how gay is he

[Philip K Dick]

whatever happened to estaban

and how gay is he

nobody knows what happened to esteban! but his mutant rape-child almost killed the narrator at the end

i don't think he's gay i think he had just given up the will to live when he was getting raped

[Michelle]

as much as i enjoy the latent misogyny in here a lot of your stories are kind of

random

[Philip K Dick]

as much as i enjoy the latent misogyny in here a lot of your stories are kind of

random

yeah

[Ashington]

Random stories like this are great fun to read, how long does it take you to write this lark?

[Philip K Dick]

Random stories like this are great fun to read, how long does it take you to write this lark?

took me about an hour

[Philip K Dick]

the bump

[trent bortknob]

i thought it was pretty funny but not like hysterical or anything like other ones i've read

it was actually kinda scary! i think im gonna have jellyfishman nightmares 2nite

[lenko]