Lil Sumthin I whipped up

YungJazz · July 1, 2008 03:33 AM

The usual. Tried simplifying a bit, but I wish I had animated it more. It's not a huge deal, it'll just be at the opening of future Nightgun flicks. w00000t.

Also a lil concept work, I've figured out the obvious, that backgrounds affect characters' colors. And that stuff can look decent without hella detail, so I can animate more.

bcube · July 1, 2008 03:41 AM

Cool, but something about the voice sets me off. I think its a bit too deep.

GRINACE · July 1, 2008 03:49 AM

lol Watching your stuff makes me wanna animate lol.

white acid · July 1, 2008 04:15 AM

wow!!

thats amazing!! you know how to do some wicked graphics!
+ super awesome story

rtil · July 1, 2008 04:16 AM

if that text says 'nightgun' it's near impossible to read

i'd also try to get rid of that click sound your mic makes at the end of every line

other than that it was pretty solid. i mean yeah it could've used some more animation but it's not like you can't pop in a few more keys later

cr0m · July 1, 2008 05:54 AM

yeah its neato but the voice seems a little off for some reason. idk what about it, maybe it needs to be more intriguing or however you want to put it. tiny bit less monotoned + louder

Fuzz · July 1, 2008 08:08 AM

The voice needs to have more life to it. Other than that It was great.

sQueef · July 1, 2008 08:30 AM

you can't change shadow detail just by fucking with hue
but it is still a neat effect that doesn't became a pain in the ass to apply so
looks good@

YungJazz · July 1, 2008 03:17 PM

Thanks, I shall take the advice. And as for the narration, I guess it was kind of hard for me to imagine adding emotion to narration. I can do it with dialogue easily, but I didn't want to overdo it and end up sounding cheesy.

sQueef · July 2, 2008 05:42 AM

I actually didn't even want to post in this thread since I couldn't think of anything nice to say but yea I did

twice

MRat · July 2, 2008 10:58 PM

Make it less in your face please. It looks like it was directed by Paul W.S. Anderson.

YungJazz · July 4, 2008 10:51 PM

Quote from: MRatMake it less in your face please. It looks like it was directed by Paul W.S. Anderson.

Less in your face? Not quite sure what you mean.

psi43 · July 4, 2008 11:18 PM

Quote from: YungJazz
Quote from: MRatMake it less in your face please. It looks like it was directed by Paul W.S. Anderson.

Less in your face? Not quite sure what you mean.

I think it means mentioning your name over and over again as in "A youngjizz production produced by youngjizz with young jizz by youngjizz" and stuff.

It didn't really bother me, though. I could also be wrong.

It was nicely made, your timing has gotten by far better from the last time I've seen something you've made.

Fuzz · July 5, 2008 02:51 AM

Why is it all black people? Are you racist? black people have white friends too.

MRat · July 5, 2008 03:21 AM

No what I mean is there is no rhythm of pace to the movie. It's like an Egoraptor flick, nothing but scenes obnoxiously slapped together.

A movie needs a rhythm, and is split into 3 acts typically (though not always!) and there needs to be a rise and a fall. Like a breath or heartbeat. You don't have this it's just... scenes. Even trailers have a rhythm and pace. This is nothing but imagery. It lacks pronunciation and emphasis. I'd say everything is overemphasized, but when they're all equally emphasized, then none of the scenes have any weight or impact.

All your work seems to suffer from this, and it's hard to explain how to fix it, because most people naturally just have a rhythm to their work. It's like being tone-deaf, but for a director. I find it very hard to watch your movies because I can't grip what's going on. I feel like an impartial bystander just sort of gazing at it. I can't be drawn in at all.

YIKES!

YungJazz · July 5, 2008 06:38 AM

Quote from: FuzzWhy is it all black people? Are you racist? black people have white friends too.

OH NO! I FORGOT WHITE PEOPLE?!?!?! GAH! I'm so ashamed! I should be more racially diverse like JAZZA, Adam Phillips and Rtil! You never have nor will you say anything to them about racial diversity.

Quote from: MRatNo what I mean is there is no rhythm of pace to the movie. It's like an Egoraptor flick, nothing but scenes obnoxiously slapped together.

A movie needs a rhythm, and is split into 3 acts typically (though not always!) and there needs to be a rise and a fall. Like a breath or heartbeat. You don't have this it's just... scenes. Even trailers have a rhythm and pace. This is nothing but imagery. It lacks pronunciation and emphasis. I'd say everything is overemphasized, but when they're all equally emphasized, then none of the scenes have any weight or impact.

All your work seems to suffer from this, and it's hard to explain how to fix it, because most people naturally just have a rhythm to their work. It's like being tone-deaf, but for a director. I find it very hard to watch your movies because I can't grip what's going on. I feel like an impartial bystander just sort of gazing at it. I can't be drawn in at all.

YIKES!

Mmhmm.... Man, you always have the most creative complaints. Okay, I'll try to work on that. Maybe you should show me how to do it better with one of your flashes, that'd make it easier to understand.

MRat · July 5, 2008 05:02 PM

I'd like to Jazz, I really would, but I haven't ever made anything worth watching.

Here's what I can say though, your narration seems to trip up th flow. It doesn't match the action on screen in tone.

bcube · July 5, 2008 07:31 PM

Quote from: YungJazz
Quote from: FuzzWhy is it all black people? Are you racist? black people have white friends too.

OH NO! I FORGOT WHITE PEOPLE?!?!?! GAH! I'm so ashamed! I should be more racially diverse like JAZZA, Adam Phillips and Rtil! You never have nor will you say anything to them about racial diversity.

I kinda agree with fuzz.
I mean sure, theres not really black people in rtils flashes or etc but that doesnt mean you should do the same mistake, no?

YungJazz · July 5, 2008 08:22 PM

Quote from: BizarreCube
Quote from: YungJazz
Quote from: FuzzWhy is it all black people? Are you racist? black people have white friends too.

OH NO! I FORGOT WHITE PEOPLE?!?!?! GAH! I'm so ashamed! I should be more racially diverse like JAZZA, Adam Phillips and Rtil! You never have nor will you say anything to them about racial diversity.

I kinda agree with fuzz.
I mean sure, theres not really black people in rtils flashes or etc but that doesnt mean you should do the same mistake, no?

There are other races in my flashes once in awhile. I just drew the characters, it's really no huge deal. If it were a regular old ghetto comedy cartoon with no action or sci-fi elements, you guys probably wouldn't say anything. I have very many characters I plan to put in the movie, and you've seen the first 5 or so in my current works there's 3 more characters in the lineup, a Hispanic girl, an Arabic girl, and a Native American girl too.

bcube · July 5, 2008 08:42 PM

I actually was always confused about the ghetto cartoon deal :U

but nice to know there are other characters there